Pitfalls of Academic Pressure
According to parenting experts and teenagers, we’re putting too much academic pressure on them, especially once they start high school. In “The State of Our Nation’s Youth Report”, the question posed to teens was: “Is the pressure to get good grades a major problem, minor problem or not a problem?” The findings have jumped dramatically since 2001:
- 10 years ago, 62% of students said that getting good grades was a problem.
- Today, 79% of students said it was a problem.
And the top 4 problems listed by high school students:
- Getting good grades.
- Getting into a good college.
- Family problems.
- Having enough money.
College on the Horizon
Wendy Mogel in her book, The Blessing of a B Minus, puts it well, “But at the first whiff of middle school, even the most laid-back parents find it difficult to practice loving acceptance of their children. Conversations with other parents turn on the importance of securing the right niche for their child before she enters the wilderness of high school: Knowing that Rachel doesn’t have a lot of natural self-discipline, I’m afraid that if she doesn’t get into the gifted and talented program, she could end up hanging out with the potheads. At parties, parents no longer talk about where to buy healthy snacks; now the preferred topic is the cutthroat process of college applications: Did you read on CollegeConfidential.com that kids who play wind instruments increase their chances of getting a scholarship? That’s why Jeremy is studying oboe. And as early as sixth grade, choosing electives becomes a fraught decision: Can Alison afford to take a World Languages class, or is it time to start developing a specialty in French? ”.
Inadequacy and Depression
While some students are enthralled with learning, enjoy test-taking and the academic atmosphere, some students are not academic: they could be artistic, poor test-takers or have learning disabilities. If your teen falls into the latter category, let them know that doing their best doesn’t necessarily mean a 4.0. Chances are good that these kids will need more encouragement from parents and teachers so they’re not tempted to “give up”.
When looking for symptoms of addiction or depression, parents are advised to look for “falling grades”. If a child is prone to depression or doesn’t handle anxiety well, the beginning of the school year can trigger those feelings. If your child starts getting headaches, stomachaches or is extremely fatigued, don’t ignore it. And it’s okay to ask your child point-blank, “Are you feeling overwhelmed or stressed out?” (Get a free ”Depression Checklist” here.)
Last January my son, then a 10th grader, didn’t want to go back to school after winter break and started doing poorly in some of his best classes. Naturally, I chalked it up to “teenage rebellion”. It turned out that part of his attitude was related to biochemical depression. Once we addressed the real issue, he got back on track and finished the year on the Honor Roll, pulling several subjects out of the ditch. Now I realize, I should’ve paid more attention to this red flag. It was definitely an indicator that something was “off”. Just thinking about all this can make my chest tight and breathing shallow, but then I remember that no one, not ANYONE has ever gotten a 4.0 in “parenting”!
27. November 2011 at 10:10 am
Hands down, Apple’s app store wins by a mile. It’s a huge selection of all sorts of apps vs a rather sad selection of a handful for Zune. Microsoft has plans, especially in the realm of games, but I’m not sure I’d want to bet on the future if this aspect is important to you. The iPod is a much better choice in that case.
23. March 2012 at 3:45 pm
Studying this post – the present of your time